BOTERO

Feckless Piker(FP): Oddvark and I went to the Botero exhibit with Peanutbutter Piker and The Cyclartist.

Oddvark Contremundo(OC): Yeah I thought Feckless was fat until I saw those Botero paintings and sculptures. Compared to them, Feckless is just a little overweight.

FP: Botero does like to portray people in Rubenesque proportions.

OC: Even the men.

FP: Yes, they are all so round it is hard to tell the men from the women. The hair and clothing are the main clue.

OC: Why do you think he does this?

FP: I'm not sure. What I am sure of is that he has been asked that question by the art community hundreds of times. I'm almost as sure that he has never answered the question, thereby preserving the mystery.

OC: I think it might be a gimmick. That may be why Botero is so controversial among art scholars. The fat people are a gimmick and some of his work is very derivative.

FP: That possibility occurred to me. He may also be trying to say that people are very much alike, except for subtle differences.

OC: Another possible interpretation is that Botero is a bit of a misanthrope and has chosen to display his hostility towards his fellow humans by portraying them as enormous fat globs.

FP: The Cyclartist proposed that it may just be that Botero became enamored with volume in his creations.

OC: Well there certainly is volume.

FP: I also think it is interesting that none of the people in the paintings are smiling (the notable exception being the portrait of Pablo Picasso, who was not known for his jolly personality), yet many of the animals portrayed are smiling. This would give credence to the misanthropic theory. In photographs of the artist himself, he never seems to be smiling. He looks like a very serious man.

OC: All this speculation and analysis is kind of fun.

FP: Yes, that is one of the best things about a Botero exhibit is that it invites a good deal of analysis and speculation about the art and the artist.

OC: I did like some of his earlier pieces, the ones that The Cyclartist thought might have been heavily influenced by the work of Francis Bacon.

FP: Yes, I think The Cyclartist was spot on with that observation.

OC: Peanutbutter Piker made some interesting observations about the man dressed in a dress. I think the painting was called, "Melancholia".

FP: Yes, I am an expert on melancholia and I couldn't see it. But, Peanutbutter convinced me that the man was sad because he knew that he was unlikely to be understood by family, friends and society. Remember he was hirsute and swarthy and unlikely to ever be mistaken for a woman. Botero dresses him in an a very brightly colored and patterned fabric.

OC: Yes, it would be very sad to go through life without the ones you cared for understanding you at all.

FP: That's true. Of course you and I never suffer from being misunderstood.

OC: It's surprising how many people can relate to bums.

FP: Speaking of bums, what did you think of the Botero statuary.

OC: On the whole, I liked it better than the paintings. There was a depth of field that is missing in most of the paintings.

FP: That's because sculpture is three-dimensional.

OC: True, but many of the paintings had a flat quality about them, even though Botero utilized techniques creating perspective.

FP: With all that volume represented in the sculpture, I just wanted to reach out and stroke the buttocks of one of those bootylicious bronze bombshells. There is just something about those ample curves that calls out for caressing with a gentle touch.

OC: I have to admit, I was thinking Mae West,Queen Latifah,Mariah Carey, Kirstie Alley.

FP: Oddvark stop, your shaking all over. I always knew you skinny guys had a thing for the plus sized models.

OC; Real women have curves dude.

FP: I hear you brother. But real women also like their men to bathe more than once a week.

OC: That's the beauty of statuary. No olfactory system.

TRUE BLOOD OR WHAT BIG TEETH YOU HAVE JETHRO

Feckless Piker(FP): How did you like that new show we watched over at Peanut Butter Piker's place last night?

Oddvark Contremundo(OC): You mean the one about the vampires?

FP: That's the one.

OC: It was kinda gory and very complicated.

FP: The gore is nothing compared to the Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Saw movies.

OC: That's true. I love those Saw movies.

FP: I know you do. True Blood is a little more subtle and the story is a lot more complex. I thought the sex and seduction angle was a little too strong for my tastes, but then again, it could be argued that the vampire mythology is all about sex and seduction. Consequently, it would be hard to overstate that aspect of the story line.

OC: Yeah, that Anna Paquin sure has grown up hasn't she. I remember when she played the little girl in The Piano and Holly Hunter had the sexy role.

FP: Oh yeah, I never saw Holly Hunter again without thinking of that role. Until then she had been known for playing little perky sparkplug types. In The Piano, she proved that she could fog up my glasses with the best of them.

OC: Can't say the same about Anna Paquin. I still think of her as a little girl.

FP: Yeah, I have the same problem with Christia Ricci. Many of these child actresses probably experience difficulties making the transition into adult roles because of the association their audiences have with their earlier work. I'm not sure that Melissa Gilbert ever successfully transcended her role on Little House on the Prairie.

OC: If I understand the plot, the vampires in True Blood are known to the general population because of the invention of a synthetic blood that is capable of nourishing them.

FP: That is part of it. Also, humans can use vampire blood for healing properties as well as to get high. So there is a lot of blood swapping going on in this show. It's kind of a creepy cavalcade of consanguinity.

OC: Hey, you just used alliteration. You might say that True Blood turns the Louisiana bayou into a voluptuous vision of verdant and vivacious vamps.

FP: Stop that! What was your favorite part of the episode we watched?

OC: I liked the drunken orgie at the Minotaur's house. Lots of booze, busty babes, and bodacious barbecue.

FP: I told you to stop that! I liked when the shape shifter changed into a collie and went running to the swimming hole with the other collie.

OC: You have always been a dog lover. Put a dog into any scene and you just love the movie.

FP: You've got a point there. However, in this case, I think the show stands on its own merits. It writing is very imaginative, the acting is pretty good, there is some humor ("My wife doesn't just whip out her pudding for anybody."), the production values are good (it is HBO after all) and it held my interest for almost a solid hour.

OC: That is high praise indeed. The only other thing that I know holds your interest for a solid hour is that damn tape you have have of Heather Locklear riding a Harley in a Bikini.

FP: Now that's good cinamatography!